Wednesday, June 08, 2005
First Love !!!!!
First Love
It was a very cloudy afternoon. After school I didn’t feel to go to tuition class. I was afraid because marks will be given for the class test. I didn’t do the test well as I used to. All because of the accident that took place three weeks ago. I had hit an electric post with my bicycle and was thrown on to ground on my chest. It cost me my two front teeth. After spending two weeks in hospital, most painful thing was the smile on everyone’s face seeing me with broken teeth. I was one of the pet students for the tuition teacher. Half mindedly I took my bicycle and started towards the tuition class.
By the time I reached the tuition class it started to drizzle heavily. I hurried through the corridor with a wet head and sprinkles of water on the face. When I went inside the class room I found every one with a tensed face anticipating the terror “Mathematics Teacher”. I usually takes the seat next to the teacher but that day I moved far from my teacher and took the seat right next to the girl’s bench. The next moment teacher entered into the class room. From her face itself everyone realized its going to be a very bad time. She usually starts asking questions while cleaning the black board. She didn’t bother to clean the black board. So it was obvious to everyone that she don’t have any intention to take class. It’s going to be a roller coaster ride for the class. As she took the test paper books every one give a deep sigh. It was as silent as a deserted room. Teacher Priya always arranges the books in descending order of marks. Every one had their eyes clutched on to the heap of test paper books to find which one belongs to them. She took the first book and called a name. It was a girl’s name. I was looking at the next book to check whether it’s mine! She took the next book and called another name. It was my friend’s name who was present at accident spot. He was delighted to hear the mark. But the first mark was only 26 and the second 25 ½ out of 30. Next was my book .I scored the same mark! The ritual continued until she finished round the class. From the mark 15 onwards she was staring at each of the student who she handed the book. She never bothered to give books to those who scored less than 10. Books were thrown out through the window onto the rain!
Teacher started from the girl who scored the highest mark. She commented that it is not supposed to be a highest mark in maths in any class room. Then she turned to my friend who scored 25 ½ and asked where he went wrong. My friend showed the book to teacher and she found out that he went wrong in writing the question itself. In our tution class students has to first take down the questions and then go to their respective places to start answering. So it turned out to be a care less mistake. Madam started to fire him for all the mistakes he had done until now. Once my friend started to weep she turned and looked at me. I always had the reputation of scoring highest among the boys. She didn’t even bother to ask me what happened but started laughing at me. Then she said I have lost every thing along with my teeth. Once the tooth was gone I'm not smiling to any one. She asked me whether I lost my brain too with it! Suddenly every one in the class started to laugh. I had a burning sensation in my heart, an electric signal ran through my spine. I was really fuming. Then I spotted the girl who scored more than me, just a ½ mark seated right next on the bench and was laughing like she had seen some joker. If I had a chance I would have burned her there itself. I looked at the floor in disbelief that I had lost the reputation of brilliance in math. The class finished off with more shouting than any maths theorem. I noticed ,the girl is still struggling to stop the laughter. I decoded in my mind “Every one will have their own share, wait for yours buddy’
I was very early for the next class, first one to be there! With in seconds the girl who laughed at me also entered the class. I realized that she’s struggling to control her laugh watching me all alone in the class. Again I started to feel the heat ! This time I had the courage to stare at her but she didn’t bother to admit the stare. But as I was about to take eyes off her, I realized,I was not staring at her but hazing at her. For the first time in my life I felt some thing that attracted me. Until then when my cricket team hazed at the girls passing by, I used to tease them calling “Wolfs with no lower jaw”.
I looking at that pretty girl with my lower jaw out of control and with a sparkle in my eyes. There it started. In that class I hardly remember any equations that were taught. When ever teacher turned to the black board my eyes went for her. That day I left class thinking why I didn’t spot her before. She was there in the class for more than three months now. I dreamt the sweet smile on her face. I had an image like memory of her face by then.
From the next class on wards I always tried to sit near her. But no one around cared for that. But when ever she looked to my side, I turned my head away. Then I realized some thing is wrong with me. I started to admire her even more ,when she managed to keep pace with me or ahead of me in every test.
I started to look the way she dresses, her handwriting, the way she presented herself. She was pretty in every sense to me. She’s soft spoken with a good accent, always wearing simple jewelry but elegant one. The best thing I found was her intelligence which was always ahead of mine. Those days the questions thrown up to be answered were not volunteered by me anymore . I waited her to stand up and answer so that I could listen to her sweet voice and look at her face without any hesitation. Until and unless I was pointed out to answer ,I always gave her chance. By then I realised her school is the girls’ high school next to my school and we came by the same bus every day. I was silently admiring her . When we completed 10th and went for the PUC I badly need the maths teacher to continue taking tuition until PUC. But I could never even smile at her. Every time she turned and looked at me, I turned to a statue. I always tried to avoid her attention so that I could look at her and admire. Then she went on to the Women’s college to do her PUC and I never meet her again.
As she lives near by my house, every day when I go throuh the junction, I still turns around and look for any traces of her. Then I found out that she had been approached by many big shots , whom she had dumped . I realized I'm in a crowd marathon rather than 100 meter hurdle with only 10 to compete for her. I still feel the untold feeling in my mind is pure love. The untold ones are the once who are really loved…
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