V: What’s up?
Me: Nothing, I’m bored as usual! What abt u?
V: Doing good (The famous ‘V’ grin after that)
S: How’s ur work man?
Me: Same old story! How abt u?
V: He is busy searching matrimonial sites
S: Nah, I don’t search, I know when my time comes!
V: ya, when the bride is ready to pay 60 lakhs, ur time will come
S: I never said that, I said I have constraints.
V: Constraints should never be such hard, what do you say C?
C: I am over aged guys; I have started looking for brides with lesser constraints (he is turning
25)
C: What about you (to me)?
Me: No plans, let’s see where it takes (I have no clue!!!)
A: (My Roomie, a soul which committed luv marriage) Why you guys have this dowry
constraints?
V: Because we live with money and a good start of anything needs MONEY
S1 (Lady, Slight feminist): Why ppl need money from gal’s dad’s pocket?
Why not guy’s Dad?
S2 (Lady, hardly talks): Curry is too spicy today
V: We have a culture to follow….
C: Culture never said about putting hard constraints!
S: I never gave hard constraints ….
The argument continues until lunch is over
This is one of the usual conversations that we (the group of V,S,C,S1,S2,A and me) run into almost everyday over lunch. May be it is because every one in that group are looking for bride/groom and all have a lot of expectations. Each of them (Including ME) has there own definition of dowry and some have put it in figures as constraints. I almost laughed over S when I heard he is looking for 60 Lakhs as dowry as he has spent 3 years in US. The luv marriage guy struggled hard to put his point that dowry is not required for a family life; it is just a bad tradition. The slightly feminist gal is never ready to pay some guy to marry her!
Every girl is expecting some one better than herself to marry her. ‘If you need some thing good, you need to pay- says the dowry supporters….This group is definitely different from other groups with which I used to have lunch with. So focused on marriage / dowry!
Some day everyone goes through this round of talks to some one or the other. Some pays off, some get paid. Many loose their principles of life when the family/ situation demands otherwise. Many go for dowry just to maintain the family status. Because the neighbor got 1 kg of gold, my son also should get 1.5 kg of gold. If anyone is willing to marry a girl without dowry, then the rumor spreads out as there is some thing wrong with the guy / girl.
Why can’t everyone live there own life leaving the bride’s and groom’s family to decide up and live along????? What I can see is, everyone in this age (24- 28) stumbles on peer pressure / family pressure / greed or any some other pressure and fumble into the dowry marriages. Not the one which ends up with a girl-gas-stove-accident but with a relation where for the initial two years, the dowry statistics will be popping up here and there in family talks when another marriage is in queue in house.
Good or bad the tradition grows on. The one who questions the tradition is considered as a fool, even when the tradition says marrying a donkey might give good monsoon showers! In that case who will give dowry, the daddy donkey or the owner of the donkey?J
This is one of the usual conversations that we (the group of V,S,C,S1,S2,A and me) run into almost everyday over lunch. May be it is because every one in that group are looking for bride/groom and all have a lot of expectations. Each of them (Including ME) has there own definition of dowry and some have put it in figures as constraints. I almost laughed over S when I heard he is looking for 60 Lakhs as dowry as he has spent 3 years in US. The luv marriage guy struggled hard to put his point that dowry is not required for a family life; it is just a bad tradition. The slightly feminist gal is never ready to pay some guy to marry her!
Every girl is expecting some one better than herself to marry her. ‘If you need some thing good, you need to pay- says the dowry supporters….This group is definitely different from other groups with which I used to have lunch with. So focused on marriage / dowry!
Some day everyone goes through this round of talks to some one or the other. Some pays off, some get paid. Many loose their principles of life when the family/ situation demands otherwise. Many go for dowry just to maintain the family status. Because the neighbor got 1 kg of gold, my son also should get 1.5 kg of gold. If anyone is willing to marry a girl without dowry, then the rumor spreads out as there is some thing wrong with the guy / girl.
Why can’t everyone live there own life leaving the bride’s and groom’s family to decide up and live along????? What I can see is, everyone in this age (24- 28) stumbles on peer pressure / family pressure / greed or any some other pressure and fumble into the dowry marriages. Not the one which ends up with a girl-gas-stove-accident but with a relation where for the initial two years, the dowry statistics will be popping up here and there in family talks when another marriage is in queue in house.
Good or bad the tradition grows on. The one who questions the tradition is considered as a fool, even when the tradition says marrying a donkey might give good monsoon showers! In that case who will give dowry, the daddy donkey or the owner of the donkey?J
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